New York or San Fran?

New York, New York… My Way… It Was A Very Good Year… If I Go Away… All of Nothing At All

Frank Sinatra's song titles seem to describe my life at the moment. I am getting My Way in having a good chance for a transfer to New York, New York. So far, this Was A Very Good Year, especially as it relates to my job and the potential transfer. But what happens If I Go Away?

I've actually started to really enjoy my life in California – a fairly new development after the last few years' surprises, disappointments, and struggles in just about every perceivable area of my life – health, career, personal relationships… I'm at my 2 year mark from my health diagnosis (tomorrow, actually) and only 2 months ago, received my "All's Clear" from the doctors. My career is going well, a new job and 2 promotions later, and I'm finally at a point where I've [mostly] let go of the after-effects of a bad relationship. I guess I'm lucky in that I did get past it, and understand it was NOT a good thing. Won't be going there again, ever!

So this year has been all new for me. I recently moved after my then-roommate decided to impose ridiculous rules for the house (no phone calls after 7pm!) and absolutely LOVE my new place. It's spacious, not too expensive, and in a really great location. And I live alone for the first time in 5 years. God, it's glorious!

I've been on a mission to live in NYC or abroad for a while, and now that I finally have the opportunity, I'm a bit nervous about whether I actually should leave. I'm excited, though sometimes I'm not sure if that's because I have what I want, or because I've "won" in getting what I (thought?) I wanted. I'm a competitive person. I don't know which one it is…

And how do I decide? It's not like I'm trying to choose between places that are near each other and I could visit quite a lot. I'm picking between either end of the country. It's likely I'll have the chance to be back on the West coast two or three times a year and I love to travel (+), but I'm giving up fabulous winter weather (-), fabulous skiing close by, (-) and the laid back attitude (-) that comes to everyone that lives out here.

I would get to keep my laid back work wardrobe (+) since the office in NYC is only 3 people large, including myself. I like dressing up, but I definitely appreciate knowing I can wander into the office in jeans when I just don't feel like putting myself together in the morning. I'd be closer to my family (+), able to travel to Europe more easily (+), and get to live in Manhattan (+). Plus, the people in California aren't straight with you like in NYC. (+,-) East coast "attitude" is that bluntness that I've really worked hard to reign in since living on the West coast.

So it's not really All Or Nothing At All. There are benefits to living in both places, though I can see that I'll end up going either because I've "won" this or because I really want to go. Either way, it'll work out. I don't have the "it's not right" feeling, which I had last time I was offered a position back East. Not to say I have the "it is right" feeling either. I guess we'll see. My time to make my decision is fast closing… I have some wiggle room, though, I do NOT want to move out there just in time for the crappy cold winter. I'll need some summer to get used to it. Waiting until the end of the year probably won't happen… My parents will be pleased.

Slight Overreaction?

Ok, so I may have slightly overreacted last night. But please grant that I had long flights and jet lag to deal with when I arrived to messed up hotel stuff and had spent the day doing my best not to get too cranky. It ended when I found the hotel.

I'm better today after my 2-3 hours of sleep last night, though still NOT happy with the hotel. Because its so late, and being the week before Queen's Day, hotels are scarce... I'm having to spent another night with loud Sexy Time noises coming from everywhere. I'm so serious! Above me, below me... people need to STOP having so much sex while I'm trying to sleep!!! (Not pleased). So another night there, then on to another hotel for 2 nights, and then another hotel for the last 2 nights. Fun stuff, but hopefully the beds have a bit more padding, the walls are thick enough to muffle sex, and my window doesn't overlook a sketchy alley with yelling weirdos all night. Cross your fingers for me.

Really, I'm better today, though it may not sound like it. ;) I'm happy to have found a decent internet connection (not cheap) and have a new hotel to look forward to tomorrow night. One that has a blow dryer since I nearly started a fire trying to use mine last night... Forgot to mention that before...

Next time I travel, I think its possible I hire someone else do to my bookings. Apparently I suck at it.

Complaining from Amsterdam

FYI – This is solely me complaining. If you continue to read this post, you cannot tell me I'm just complaining. It will get better at some point, and maybe then I'll post a happy blog. Until then, just let me rant.
Amsterdam has lost major points.

Yes, today, my opinion of Amsterdam is hardly above "sucks". Possibly below that, actually. Maybe I'm just being grumpy and exhausted after being in airports and in planes for the last 12 hours and then getting poor directions to hotel (resulting in an extra 20 minutes wandering around Central Amsterdam) but I think this is the first time I've ever been in a foreign country and just wanted to go home. My hotel room wasn't booked correctly and now I have a shared bathroom to deal with. I moved out the dorms in college because I hated sharing bathrooms. I do NOT want to be back there now. There is a spring poking through the mattress. How am I supposed to get a decent night's rest? The internet that I also required the hotel to have is broken. So neither can I work from here tomorrow, nor can I find a new place to stay tonight. I'm annoyed. And exhausted. And really displeased with the current situation.

Can someone/anyone fix this crappola!?